Let’s face it – even the most sceptical of us would be intrigued at what a masterclass titled ‘Finding Mr or Mrs Right’ would entail.
Saturday was the perfect day to find out as I made my way to the Bermondsey Square Hotel. I sometimes do my best thinking on a long walk and making my way down to the masterclass hosted by Wajeeha Amin triggered a flurry of thoughts – what am I going to gain from this class? How does one even find Mr Right?
The masterclass itself is split into three stages, two of which I’ve completed. Wajeeha is very clear in how the process works and I have to say despite having reservations, the best way to see whether or not I would gain from this was to throw myself in completely.
Stage One: The phone consultation
The first stage was a phone consultation with Wajeeha. As formal as it sounds, it was essentially a conversation about where you’re at in terms of your personal life. Wajeeha was patient and gave me the time to gather my thoughts if I needed to and I felt like not even half way in to the phone call, it was like speaking to a friend.
Her tone was warm, understanding and considerate, which I found to be a massive comfort to me as there were some questions that warranted a moment to really reflect.
The purpose of this conversation is not only to gauge where you are, but to allow Wajeeha to include elements within the actual masterclass (stage two) that are relevant to you. I was curiuous how this would pan out, considering that I would be in a class with others who have had their own personal journeys up until this point.
Stage Two: The Masterclass
The second stage was meeting for the day long masterclass which was attended by a handful of other people. Though open to both men and women, we were a class of seven females which I think was great in terms of allowing us to let our guard down a little.
Our environment was airy but full of personality as you can see from several of my snaps. For me, it was the ideal setting to spend a day learning more about ourselves and gaining tools to help us in a very important part of our lives.
Wajeeha makes it clear that she isn’t going to promise us Mr Right, but she’s going to equip us with the tools we need to make better decisions when it comes to selecting and maintaining a potential relationship.
It’s definitely not easy being an open book and talking about yourself among a group of people who you’ve just met but the more I saw other people sharing, the more I felt as though it was a safe environment for me to open up.
The day was filled with discussions and activities. We were asked really thought provoking questions – questions we should be thinking about more often.
What do you value in life?
Why do you do what you do?
Plus we got the chance to get to know other people in the class over a delicious lunch.
This masterclass was great in terms of equipping us with an alternative way of thinking which not only will help us to build confidence in areas we lack such as connecting or even selecting a potential partner, but will remind us of our value and to never doubt what we’re worth. We spent some time thinking about core character values and discussing which positive ones were important to us and which negative values we absolutely could not tolerate.
It was kind of hard realising that the positive character values we picked out were not only elements I wanted and expected in a significant other, but they had been missing in previous relationships and it was clear that I had overlooked them in order to keep what I thought was a good thing going.
Those kind of realisations are quite difficult, especially as they came in waves during the day. But the truth is, if this masterclass didn’t ask me to think about things like this, I probably wouldn’t have admitted it or even come to this conclusion.
I felt like the masterclass was an opportunity to be real with yourself. It was the chance to really look at yourself and evaluate where your weaknesses are and understand through exercises and dialogue how you can improve yourself.
You may be surprised but I’m a massive believer in self improvement. How else can anyone experience the very best of you if you don’t even know yourself?
Summing up the masterclass is hard but I think I’ve managed to do so below…
Three important things I learnt during the day:
- All things start as a challenge. with enough perseverance that becomes habit and then eventually nature
- I am my own competition and sometimes my own downfall.
- In order to find someone who matches your character values, you first need to practice your own.
Three important things came to my attention throughout the day:
- Everyone has their own journey and it was an eye opener to learn about other people’s struggles
- I thought I had boundaries in place all this time and it turns out that I allowed people to over step the mark time and time again
- There really is no rush to settle down. Despite the mounting pressure from family.
We place such an importance about getting married in Asian culture as though that’s the only thing we have to look forward to as women. The reality is a lot of us are way too busy making a difference in our own and other people’s lives, which is way more important than a ring on our finger.
The sooner parents, families, elders and most importantly MEN realise this, the better.
In part 2, I’ll be exploring what the final stage of this programme teaches me, how I feel going forward after the experience and whether I did find Mr Right!